One of the most challenging things to accept as a divorcing parent is that you might not see your child as much as you want. Yet, that is not a bad thing.
Your child needs to see both you and their other parent after the divorce. While they might be your only child, you are not their only parent.
Focus on the quality of time you spend with your child
Parents often focus on getting the most time with their child possible when working out custody arrangements. Hours are an easy thing to measure, but if you looked at the quality of time, you can each give your child, that might turn up a different solution. Here are a few things to consider when thinking about quality vs. quantity:
- You need to work: Once you divorce, you and the other parent may need to work more to cope with the cost of running two households. Coparenting reduces the need to spend on childcare.
- You need to relax: Children can be tiring, and you need time away from them if you want to be the best parent you can.
- You need to pursue other interests: You are not just your child’s dad or mom. You are an individual. It is easy to forget your friends and interests when raising children, yet they help make you a more rounded person with more to offer your child.
If you are still reluctant to share custody of your child, why not speak to some single parents. They would jump at the opportunity to have someone else take care of their child for a few hours or few days each week. Divorce will be challenging, yet if you can accept that sharing parenting is a positive, not a negative, it will simplify negotiations.